How to have fun in life

How to have fun in life.

George Bernard Shaw said, ‘We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing’.

You would imagine that playing and being playful would be the most natural thing in the world, but it isn’t. Without realising, many of us stopped playing somewhere between childhood and adulthood when life became fuller and other priorities and responsibilities took over. As kids, we are often naturally playful, but as we get older, we seem to lose this skill, even to the extent that we devalue it and deem it unnecessary. The result is that many midlifers don’t know how to play, even though they may have the time and resources to do so.

Often, what prevents people from playing is that they feel guilty about taking time out and feel they should be working rather than taking time to enjoy themselves. Play is an important part of our lives and continued happiness. It enhances our mental health, our mood, and our enjoyment in life when we do things that are fun, silly, make us laugh, or bring joy to our souls.  Can you give yourself permission to play?

Everybody’s idea of play is different, one person’s idea of play might be to read new scientific research (or is that just me?) another might be to sweat it out on an hour-long spin session at the gym. Some people might prefer to sit for hours watching films, while others might prefer to do charitable work or walk with the dog. T

There’s something very pure about the pastimes we engaged in when we were younger because at that time games tended to be less society-led, less expensive and more about being with a group of friends and being free. Decisions about what games to play were made often without influence – you can’t fake having a good time. Our early lives can hold the secret to our natural enjoyment of how to play before our adult self-became conditioned and sensible.

Here are some pointers:

• Remember your childhood. Make a list of things you used to do as a child just for fun. Then see how these childhood activities might transfer into grown-up activities. Playing video games as a child could turn into an adult’s Dungeons and Dragons online group, tap dancing might turn into a salsa or swing class, and riding your bike could turn into getting a motorbike and joining a club for ride-outs.
• Use the internet as a resource. To see what ‘fun’ might mean for you, use the internet to search ‘fun things to do as an adult’ or ‘bucket list ideas’ and when a long list appears, follow your natural interest and the body’s response and see which activities you click on for further information.
• Play for health reasons. Playful activity is not only good for the soul, but it releases endorphins in the bloodstream which can help us release stress, reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression, enhances brain function and help create a feeling of well-being. Having a laugh with friends, having sex, meditation, exercising, relaxing, getting a massage, and spending time outdoors in the sun are all ways of releasing endorphins.

Use your values. Think of those aspects of play that might ap peal to you and consider how this would tie in with your values and the sort of people you would like to spend time with.

• Decide who to play with. If life is demanding enough, then choose to play in a relaxed environment rather than a competitive one and decide whether you want to play alone or in the company of others
• Allocate time. Each week or month dedicate time to try out a new activity. If you don’t enjoy it, that’s okay at least you know and can take that knowledge and try it in another way. You might find that you need a quieter environment, need more movement, need to be more intellectually stimulated, or need to be in dialogue with others.
• Endorphins are often known as the body’s natural pain reliever or stress release and they are boosted within us when we play and have fun, increasing happiness and contributing to a greater sense of wellbeing.

If you would like help with your midlife transition or to find direction in the second half of life, why not read The Midlife Crisis Handbook or attend a course at The Midlife Academy.